Giants Don't Get Swept, Win 3-1

A roving band of Philadelphia thugs assaults a hapless pedestrian.

The good news is the Giants are getting plenty of hits. More than enough hits. The bad news is that none of these hits are coming with men in scoring position, or, in yesterday's case, the hits with runners in scoring position aren't actually scoring runs. The Giants should think about not calling second base "scoring position." From now on, "scoring position" should just be "when a Giants runner touches home plate directly, without first being tagged out." That's a little weighty, but far more accurate.

So the Giants, despite losing like twelve of their last ten, never left first place. The Pirates are coming to town toting a massive, massive losing streak and their pitchers have given up about twelve billion runs in the past ten games. Nothing's better for snapping a losing streak than playing the Giants, and nothing's better for pitchers with ERAs over 5.00 than facing some Giants bats. The Giants are the equal-opportunity defending World Champs. "Say, we feel just awful about your luck, fellas. We'll swing at first pitches the whole night, what say?"

Prediction: Giants take one of three, get two-hit in one of the games and shut out in another.