Monday, July 25, 2011

Baseball Feelings Congratulates the 2011 Hall of Fame Class

Not pictured: plaques bearing passable likenesses of Pat Gillick, Roberto Alomar, or Bert Blyleven 
The entire staff (lol) of Baseball Feelings wishes to extend its most heartfelt congratulations to the 2011 inductees into the National Baseball Hall of Fame and Museum. There is kind of an unreal amount of nonsense surrounding the Baseball Hall of Fame, and I am actually totally into that nonsense, but this is a no-nonsense group of inductees: Pat Gillick built champions in Toronto and Philadelphia as well as winners in Baltimore and Seattle; Bert Blyleven had been one of the Hall's most inexcusable oversights for years; and Roberto Alomar was the greatest second baseman of his generation and arguably the second best since integration. 


There has been an enormous amount written about all three of these first-rate baseball men over the last few days, and to all of that I will only add the following: 


(i) Pat Gillick is of course best known for the trade that sent Fred McGriff and Tony Fernandez to San Diego in exchange for Joe Carter and Roberto Alomar, in one of the great pure baseball trades in baseball history, but his character is perhaps best revealed in the deal that sent Alan Ashby to Houston after the 1978 season. Ashby, soon after word of the trade came through, found himself on the phone with Gillick, who made him an offer on the condo he kept near the Blue Jays spring training facility in Dunedin, Florida, because, I mean, it's not like Ashby was going to need it anymore, right? That is some shrewd, coldblooded stuff right there, and that is how you build a winner.


(ii) For non-Blue Jays fans, the biggest moment in Blue Jays history is no doubt Joe Carter's home run in the bottom of the ninth inning of game six in the 1993 World Series. That is entirely reasonable, and I totally get it: it's one of the most dramatic World Series endings ever. I am pretty fond of it too. But the pivotal moment that turned the Blue Jays from perennial contenders who always came up just short -- that is to say, chokers -- to champions came a year before, and it wasn't Dave Winfield's double down the left-field line that brought in the winning runs in extra innings. It was Game Four of the 1992 ALCS. It really, really seemed like it was all falling apart for the Jays, and then to make matters worse, the utterly loathsome Dennis Eckersly had the gall to point at Ed Sprague in an aggressive and confrontational manner after striking him out. I could not have hated what was happening any more than I did. And then this happened:




What still gets me about the Alomar home run that finally made the Blue Jays winners is that reaction, arms up the moment the ball left the bat. You look at that, and you'd think Alomar had hit it a ton, but it was actually kind of a scraper, just enough to make it out of the Coliseum. Somehow, thought, it was a complete no-doubter to Robbie. For me, it's the most important moment in Toronto Blue Jays history. Statements like "Roberto Alomar was the best player to ever wear the uniform," which you see sometimes, are complicated by Roger Clemens' two seasons with the team and Rickey Henderson's half-year stint, but I appreciate where they're coming from. When you look back at it all, it's strange how brief Alomar's stay in Toronto really was -- 1991 through only 1995 -- but at the same time, there's no doubt he's a Blue Jay, and no doubt one of the best.  


Also, he did a goofy add for McCain's Fruit Punch one time and he is still living with the consequences of that decision. It inspired the following image, in which I used every one of my Photoshop skills to what I think you'll agree is startling effect:




The last thing I want to tell you about Robero Alomar right now -- aside from saying that if you are still mad about how he spit at John Hirschbeck years after Hirschbeck and Alomar put it totally behind them, I don't like you -- is actually a Stephen Brunt story. Brunt signed on to write a book with Alomar at the last minute after the previously contracted writer bailed. Brunt is not particularly proud of the literary merits of the work, but he talks warmly about his time with Robbie and meeting the various Alomars and all of that. The best part about the whole deal, though, was going to book signings with Alomar where scads of young women would line up for Robbie's autograph, scowl at Brunt when he dared profane their books with his signature next to their boyfriend's, and then pretty much say the filthiest stuff you've ever heard to Robbie. This did not happen just one or two notable times, Brunt says, but instead like all the time. Invariably, Robbie would turn to Brunt and ask in delight and disbelief, "Stephen, d'you hear what she say?"   


(iii) As long as there are baseball feelings there shall be Baseball Feelings, and as long as there is Baseball Feelings, there shall be Bert Blyleven and his t-shirt. Blyleven might be fifth all-time in strikeouts and the thirteenth-best pitcher ever by WAR with 60 shutouts to his credit and one of the best curveballs anyone has ever seen, but it's that shirt, man, that shirt that really does it for me. Also, he's pretty open about it:

Q: Speaking of pride, what about this T-shirt you've been photographed wearing that says, "I [heart] to fart"?
BB: I LOVE to fart.
Q: What's wrong with you?
BB: I'm honest. Have you ever farted?
Q: One or two times.
BB: And did it feel good?
Q: Always.
BB: Probably so. That's why I wore it. I love to fart. I do. When the time is right, I do it. I'm not going to hide it.
Q: You're so blunt about your love for flatulence.
BB: Yeah. Well, someone gave me the shirt because of my history of farting, so I wear it. I LOVE to fart. I think I still have it.
Q: What gets you really gassy?
BB: Anything. The air we're breathing right now.
Q: Should I be ready for something?
BB: I have no trouble.

He has no trouble. It's not a threat; it's a statement of fact. He has no trouble.


And that, friends, is your Class of 2011.


KS

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