Remember how Barry Bonds totally took some stuff and then said he didn't know what it was?

Looks like crazy chest hair at first, but I think he's just standing behind a fuzzy headed person.

You could be forgiven for not realizing that the Barry Bonds perjury trial is underway, but a jury has been selected and everything. This thing is happening. Stephen Brunt has it right in the Globe and Mail, though, when he says (or I guess the headline writer does, but whatever), "Bonds hits court, and the world yawns."  Pretty much!  I mean, make no mistake, I think it would be kind of awesome if he was found guilty -- not because it will have made any of this worthwhile or anything, except for the sake of lolz, which is an end in and of itself I suppose -- but I'm actually way more into the looming Roger Clemens case, just because Clemens has so thoroughly played himself in all of this that it's going to be a much better show. If Bonds perjured himself, he totally did it in his own idiom, which is not caring at all what you or anyone else thought about him, or about anything, really.  Bonds' perjury, if that's what it is, is a perjury of not giving a fuck: "Not that I recall," "No," "No, no," and "Right" are the four counts of perjury.  That's kind of awesome, and way cooler than Roger Clemens' (alleged) perjury, which revealed him to be a total carelord.  Watch again, if you haven't recently, the testimony that got him charged with obstruction of congress (obstruction of congress!), and it's like, well done, your carelordship. 


Anyway, they're both probably going to go down.  Or maybe they'll both get off, who cares?  I don't, really.  But I think it's worth noting that, yeah, the specific ways these guys perjured themselves (allegedly) is revealing of their characters. Bonds: so arrogant that, strangely, you almost admire it. Clemens: such a try-hard that you can't help but feel even worse than you already did for poor Mindy McCready, who Clemens may have had a decade-long affair with, but who he totally didn't statutorily rape, right?


KS