Sad DC 10-4

Edwin Jackson (who I love)

came out the gate giving up runs

but D. Johnson kept him in

then the Nats almost came back

then Tom Gorzelanny (who I thought was dead or from the ‘80s or something)

came out and gave up even more runs

letting the first 7 dudes he faced on base

but D. Johnson kept him in

it is only one game, thus no one cared

as the Nats had already won 3 of 3 from the ‘stros

essentially, this is why I stop caring

actual human beings paid actual money to watch an actual game

but the teams didn’t have to give a fuck

thus why should I?

stupid fucking baseball

Curly W 5-2

so b-lidge tried to fuck up a masterful performance

by el hijo del gigante and a perfect home opener

w/a shittastic top of the 9th (come back Drew Storen)

but Craig Stammen (his last name means "plant dick")

held it down and then my man Zimmy

(that's what we call him lovingly - "Zimmy")

scored the winning run on a wild pitch

despite going 0-for-4 on the day

this team has a something about them that just screams "wild card"

but also has injury prone stars and already injured role players

(what up Drew Storen & Michael Morse, see y'all in summertime)

that also screams "maybe next year" at the exact same time

anyways, at least we are screaming and not just sucking

Curly W 4-2

our prized show goat is on a short leash

but so was the Mets' starter

fucking pitch counts man & inning counts & fuck

too much metric in this alleged American pasttime

America is about buttheaded brilliance not worrying about shit

(fuck America btw)

but YAY NATS the pitching has been rock solid

& the bats got busy today as well

my biggest concern is how much Ryan Zimmerman looks like Will Clark now

I don't like Will Clark, the least the Nats could do

is get a 2012 Kevin Mitchell to go with Zimmy

(I do not know if "Zimmy" is a nickname)

12-10